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But thinking I could handle these things all by my bad self, I postponed therapy until the day after my 28th birthday, when I looked around at my life, which was full of blessings, and realized how truly unhappy I was.I needed a new way of examining my life and approaching my experiences, especially when it came to dating. (And trust me, that’s definitely not a humble brag. I recently looked back at my Google calendar from those early days, and I’m astounded by how jam-packed it is. But there’s no better way to describe what life was like back then.) We were working at full-time office jobs, going through an intensive coach-training program, getting our business off the ground simultaneously.But just because your mind is constantly worrying about all of the potentially disastrous outcomes, the likelihood of your worst-case scenario actually happening is Now I want to hear from you. In what ways are you already living your worst-case scenario? Much Love, Kristen (& Rachel) Change your bad habits (& get over your fear of failure) with Jessica Binder (March 2019) Bust through any block with Ryan Mathie (January 2019) Blog: When is it worth getting out of your comfort zone?I should have started going to therapy a long time ago, right after a difficult breakup and right before my father was diagnosed with cancer.

“People have to be mindful of their negative thoughts, and when they have them to replace them with a realistic or positive one," she says.Shifting the focus to what we do have control over, and what we can make small positive steps towards can be empowering and attitude shifting."Think of something you can do each and every day that will calm your nerves and help you relax, this could be a bath, a workout class or even a recipe that you enjoy.Though you can’t magically make someone text you back or get an email back from a possible employer, you can do things that bring you joy.Our human minds are designed for worst-case scenario thinking, and that makes sense from a purely survival-oriented, instinctual approach to life.It’s our brains way of trying to protect us in advance from danger.

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However, in doing so, they do not open themselves to a more realistic or positive outcome." If catastrophizing sounds a lot like what you do when you approach certain areas of your life — from your career to finding love — Martinez notes that it’s far more common than you may realize.

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